interminable May

this has been the longest May on record, stretching far beyond the deceitful thirty-one days implied by the calendar. it has been punctuated by celebration and disagreement, argument and fallout, birthday and wake, reggae and silence.

films have come, films have gone; yesterday i watched a three year old have her cake and eat it too:

but this is beside the point.

the point is that my yin and i leave for North Carolina in a little more than two weeks, and i am beyond ready for our departure. we have been readying ourselves over the weekend, connecting with our friends and loved ones before we leave for the summer:

going to the gallery on Friday night

hosting a pool party on Saturday evening

attending fore-mentioned birthday on Sunday afternoon

and yet, in spite of all this, there has been some strange backwards pull, almost as if the chaos at the start of the month has refused to let go entirely of the its stranglehold on May. i hear its echoes in phone conversations, and smell its presence in the lingering aroma of bacon. i taste in my morning coffee – after the black, before the bitter – and see its shadow in the reflections of mirrors:

i anticipate tomorrow, the first, with the temerity of Blake's tiger...

and wait.